When life gets overwhelming, I retreat. I avoid family and friends and social situations. I stop calling. I stop emailing. I stop transmitting. I go completely radio silent.
Honestly, I don’t know if anyone really notices. Which is exactly what I prefer. It’s easy to just fade into the craziness of life.
But there’s actually a reasonable explanation for this behavior, and it’s not denial.
It’s that I have a hard time pretending, and an even harder time lying. So until I am ready and able to own my hardship in public and speak the truth, it’s just easier for me to retreat to a place where I can safely work through the problem and figure out a solution.
Which is the reason I haven’t posted much over the past two weeks. Life is funny that way. One minute you are clicking along, in the zone, firing on all cylinders. You are satisfied. You are happy. You are progressing. And the next thing you know, life turns upside down.
For me, it was a combination of things that drove me to silence. Catching up from a vacation without the kids, getting started on a fund-raising effort, and of course, the straw that broke the camel’s back, the realization that the Magician was struggling with school.
When your unconventional kids starts to struggle at his unconventional school, it’s hard to know what to do.
But, life is funny that way, too. Every time I hit a roadblock, a new path emerges. Every time my resources fail me, new ones seem to appear. Life just has a funny way of working itself out. I should know this by now.